I’m sure you’re familiar with my work. Maybe you saw me at work in a strip mall in Mobile, Alabama or a strip mall parking lot in Tulsa, or perhaps in a bowling alley in a strip mall in Ft. Lauderdale. Then there’s my ad, which people seem to remember. Or maybe you received a card featuring one of my photos at Christmas - they do make “purrrfect gifts!” Truth in advertising!
For years now, I’ve been taking “Live Tiger Cub Pictures,” and I’ve built up quite a reputation. Why, if you see a picture of any ordinary family that just also happens to feature a pair of live tiger cubs, that moment was absolutely captured by me.
The idea came to me years ago when I worked as a studio photographer. Something was missing from my life, it just didn’t feel complete or full. One night, I had a dream. There was a camera, a photo studio, and a exotic, newborn, antelope-feasting jungle cat that in no way looked out of place in any family portrait! The very next day, I paid $500 for a tiger cub. The camera I already had.
It’s been 4 years since I started the business, and there are dozens of satisfied customers. But how many photos of little Madison with a tiger cub can you have? Even I know that more than one portrait with a tiger on the ‘fridge is gauche.
That’s why I’m proud to introduce Phase II of my enterprise, making extraordinary portraits that much more extraordinary.
Which is more exciting?
Terrence in his cub scout uniform or Terrence in his cub scout uniform with his friend Lance the Aye-Aye, a nocturnal primate from the mysterious island nation of Madagascar?
Regan in her communion dress or Regan in that same communion dress swaddling a baby mountain gorilla?
The Harrington family in matching red sweaters or a color-coordinated Harrington family encircling an orphaned African elephant?
People will be flinging feces at one another to get a look at these! I mean, anytime you’re cozying up to a tapir, it’s something of a celebration.
Pictures like these still make “purrrfect gifts,” but they’ve got added staying power, sure to occupy prime fridge real estate through 2010. And once you’ve been photographed with a tiger, and again with a tapir, everyone will wonder what you’ll be captured with next.
Call to make your appointment today…
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