Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Bright Lights Underground

It’s so bright here underground in the subway, good thing you’ve got those sunglasses on. Wish I’d thought to wear mine down here, then I wouldn’t be blinded by the fluorescent lights and tunnel darkness. Sharp thinking, I can tell you’ve got your bases covered.

Now that I think of it, they probably help you read your copy of AM New York down here too. Not to mention you look great. You probably spent at least 5 minutes adjusting those Aviators just so –

8 minutes? It shows.

Oh yeah, sorry, I’ll shift over. I’d hate to be what gets between you and your reflection in the subway door. If only the glare from the track lights didn’t get in the way, it totally ruins the effect. But your hair looks great– so shiny! – I think everyone in this car would agree. If they're anything like me, they haven't been able to take their eyes off you either. I bet we’re split evenly as to whether you look better when your head is turned just slightly to the right versus when you turn it to the left. I can poll everyone, no doubt they’ll all have an opinion. I’m on the fence myself. Turn it left again. Right. Left again.

I say right, you look better when you turn your head 3 degrees to the right. It all just works then. I think you should spend the day facing 3 degrees to the right, chin pulled slightly down. Those are your best angles. We all agree.

Can you just imagine how you’d look if you didn’t take the subway every morning? What if you just had those 35 precious minutes in front of the mirror before you left your apartment! You’d be a mess! This train does wonders for you, and I’m so glad we had this time together. If I haven’t said it already, you look great, just great, really great. Those are Ray-Bans, aren’t they? Of course they are, I can see the word “Ray-Ban” in your reflection. I’m such an idiot sometimes.

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